Have you noticed that people seem more comfortable saying hello to each other when they’re dressed as pumpkins, santa, or it’s the 1st day of January?

Do you know how many people cross your path in an average month? Walking down the street, shopping in Trader Joe’s, getting that pedicure?

A lot.

Most of us have things we want in life – but we worry about asking for them, or even letting ourselves get help clarifying them.

In England, when you reach 100 years old, you get a letter from the Queen – congratulating you. My Great Aunt is 97 years old. She’s lived life on her own terms and in the coming days/weeks/months we all know she’s going to leave us – still on her own terms. “I do NOT want a letter from the Queen”. She’s sure that reaching 100 years old is not an option.

Aunty Evelyn lives alone. She reminds me that life is precious, and that the energy and enthusiasm we often take for granted is finite.

When we talk to each other, when we say ‘hello’ and genuinely want to know ‘how are you?’ we open doors. We open doors with open hearts.

David was hiking. He came to a fork in the trail. His gut said “Go right”. This was a new trail. What would you do?

Your gut. No, not that mass of flesh surrounding your belly button. Your ‘other’ gut. That inner voice that really, really wants you to trust it – and that, depending on what it’s asking you to do, you and your mind either decide to follow or disenfranchise.

Most of us would take the job, keep the house, and be miserable. Most of us would Go Right on the trail. One choice ignores the gut instinct, one trusts it.

It’s an interesting dilemma, because the more we practice following our intuition, the more we recognize that voice and can take larger risks. But without a track-record of success – it’s pretty tough to be suddenly faced with a huge decision and be able to just leap. Most won’t. Understandably so.

What to do about this? Simple. Start practicing now! ‘Go Right’ more often, and you’ll get braver. You’ll begin to differentiate between your inner voice and other voices (including fear).

Please know that a BIG part of this is you must be relaxed. You cannot hear your intuitive voice when you’re busy, frenzied and in big time ‘doing’ mode.

This article will help you. It’s my 4-step process for developing your intuitive intelligence for professional success. Is it worth is? Well… only if people such as Einstein, Ray Kroc, Donald Trump, Warren Buffett or some of the world’s top executives are credible in your eyes.

CLICK HERE: Intuitive Intelligence

Full day workshop for professional clarity & career growth: 

“Make peace with your Inner Critic – and develop your Intuitive Intelligence.”

Maximum: 8 participants

Date: TBD

CLARITY UNLIMITED BIRTHDAY SPECIAL OFFER

50% off for the first 5 people to reach out

(use the code: “Birthday” when you email/call to set up an Exploration Call)

What you get:

• Learn the 6 areas of life to explore when things get tough, and how knowing these can move you from stuckness to success, ease & flow.
• Uncover specific behaviors and beliefs that you need to embody and strengthen for better results 
• Experience greater ease and access to your creativity – get the internal voices on your side! 
• Specific tools to keep you aligned and connected to your intuitive center, even during challenging times 
• A unique tool that will forever positively change how you relate to fear 
• Access flow of ideas and clear actionable steps that want to happen in your business 
• A strategic, personalized action plan for you to follow that will get you the results you want – faster 

People are saying:

“Get REAL got me to a place of knowing specific steps that come from my own inner wisdom.” Deborah Frangquist

“Clara’s workshops are always extremely powerful and life shifting. The parts work is highly revealing.” Desiree Holden

“I learned so much about my ‘selves’. A fabulous day – I have much more clarity!” 

Tina Delaney

People tend to fall into two camps (it’s never quite that simple, I know) – those who think the best and those who think the worst. Those who think the best test their theories, and when faced with a negative interpretation look for another possibility. People who think the worst, tend to personalize or project negative intentions onto others.

Two Examples: 

A) Jane, a friend, hasn’t called for a week – those who think the best might call and see if she’s okay; those who think the worst might assume she doesn’t like them anymore, they did something wrong or she’s selfish.

B) John, at work, has missed an important deadline, again – people who think the best might assume he’s distracted by something going on in his life or overwhelmed and inquire to see if he needs assistance; those who think the worst might judge him as undependable, warn others in the office about working with him, and avoid being on projects with him.

Most People Deserve the Benefit of the Doubt

I’ve been coaching women and men, which is an intimate relationship, for many years. I cannot think of a time when I was faced with someone who intended to do harm (of course, they absolutely do exist). Most of the time “regular” people’s intentions behind their behaviors are grounded in goodness. Yes, sometimes chosen behaviors may be designed to self-protect (not expressing appreciation because of not feeling safe to open up; not returning an email because of not knowing how to word the answer) and have negative outcomes, but rarely are they malicious or somehow reflective of flawed character. People, in my experience, are basically good and doing the best they can. And if they’re not – it might be time to choose new friends.

The benefits

People who tend to assume the best of others tend to trust more, live happier lives, have lower stress, more energy and a more positive outlook. They tend to be physically and mentally healthier, and have stronger social/family communities that they can depend on.

Be clear in your intentions, be pure in your intentions, and do your best. Those who are worthy of your love, time and energy will approach you to double-check their assumptions. They’ll see the best and when they see the worst it won’t fit the version of you they hold dear. They’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and/or you’ll get a chance to clarify. Or make it right :)

Fill your world with people who insist on seeing the best in you, you deserve it.

Try this for One Week

My invitation to you… See the best in absolutely everyone and every scenario for the next week.

Success stories happily received :)

“Do one thing every day that scares you.”

Upcoming 1-day workshop: 

“Make Peace with your Inner Critic(s)

Attract more clients and business opportunities – with Ease.”

January 28th, 2012; 9am to 6:30pm

Maximum: 8 participants (1 space available)

from Clara

December 1, 2011

How do you like the new look? Finally here, right in time for the holidays :)

At the end of each year I do three things:

1. Get my clients to complete their Vision Letter for 2012. (Would you like one? See below)

2. Complete my own.

3. Reflect on the year just ending – what worked, what didn’t, and what inspired me.

Lots of exciting things happened last year (coaching, team building, corporate training, lots of speaking), and I’m excited about 2012: new programs giving you what you want, special offers, and free resources!

We have a new website and would love you to take a look. Letting us know what you think is even better! There’s a fabulous free article about decision-making, and you can sign up for a complimentary discovery call with me:

www.ClarityUnlimited.com

Here’s the link to the FREE ARTICLE: 

CLICK HERE

As a thank you to YOU - I’d like to send you the Vision Letter template. Just drop me an email to: info@ClarityUnlimited.com and I’ll send it right over.

VERY HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO YOU! 

And a heartfelt THANK YOU. Without you, I couldn’t do the work I do and Clarity Unlimited would not be able to serve growing numbers of women and men around the world.

With love, a life fulfilled, and a professional life that will leave a legacy you’re proud of,

Clara

Clara Chorley

CEO, President & Founder

Leadership Development | Speaker. Coach. Consultant

Keynotes/Trainings

Get REAL: 4 Ways to Harness your Intuitive Intelligence for Business Growth

Get CLEAR: 4 Steps to Building Trust and Communication in the Workplace

How to have difficult conversations using the

Appreciation Sandwich

The Holidays are here – hope this helps with those high stress business and tricky family moments!

 Scenario: your client shows up late again and gets angry with you when you begin to state how your feel about it; that tone of voice  makes you feel about 2 inches tall.

How do you address these sticky situations? Well, one way is using The Appreciation Sandwich.

TOP

“What I appreciate about you is…”

Find 1 or 2 things that you genuinely admire or appreciate about them. Things that are relevant to the scenario – and start by expressing that. For ex: ”You really do give your best to the work we’re doing and you have a great deal that you’re juggling in your life, many wouldn’t be able to hold so many balls in the air”. Be relevant and see the best.

MIDDLE

“What I would like is…”

Next, let them know how you’re experiencing the tone of voice, and what you want. For ex: “When you speak to me in that tone of voice I feel very uncomfortable, especially when I’ve just waited for you. What I would like is for it to stop, or for you to share with me what’s going on.”Make the request, get curious.

BOTTOM

“What I appreciate about you is…”

Yup, you end with more appreciation. For ex: ”Thank you for hearing my request, I know you mean well and have positive intentions for our time together today, I appreciate you being here.”

Smile, see if there’s a response, and then let it go!

Obviously you’ll use your own words, and sometimes it’s more about you standing up for yourself than waiting for a response.

The secret sauce is to be genuine, find the good things in the other person and approach them and the interaction with the assumption they have best intentions. Expect it to take practice and, if need be, give yourself permission to take a moment to breath and calm down before you start speaking.

Again, let me know how I can support you.

Have a fabulous Holiday Season!

Clara

Clara Chorley | CEO

Clarity Unlimited | Leadership Development | Speaking. Coaching. Consulting.

Get R.E.A.L. © for business growth

Get C.L.E.A.R. © with your communication

Scenario A: you’re at the movie theater with a friend, you want to see Puss n’Boots, she doesn’t. You go to her movie because ‘she always wins anyway’.

Scenario B: you’re on the phone with a business associate and they speak to you, again, in that tone that makes you feel about 2 inches tall. You grit your teeth and say nothing. Again.

What would it be like for you to begin to get a little more REAL with those around you? To request the movie you want to see? To teach others how you want to be treated, in a way that honors you and them?

 Worst Case Outcome: Scenario A: you watch Puss n’Boots alone (it’s very funny, by the way!)

Worst Case Outcome: Scenario B: you say something & the other person says they don’t care and decides not to work with you anymore. Is that Good news or Bad news? It’s Good news!

Wouldn’t you rather know that someone’s not the right friend or business associate, than be on egg shells because you’re afraid of an imagined outcome, that you also imagine you can’t (or don’t want to) deal with?

So you stand up for yourself, you feel stronger, better, and you’re equipped to handle those situations next time. (Yes, there will be a next time). The added benefit is you being stronger elicits more trust from those around you. People get a sense that you can handle things – and then they want to do business with you.

Getting REAL can make space for people and opportunities that are Right for you, to come into your life. You’re worth that.

My expertise is how to have those difficult conversations. Let me know if I can support you.

Clara

Clara Chorley | CEO

Clarity Unlimited | Leadership Development | Speaking. Coaching. Consulting.

Get R.E.A.L. © for business growth

Get C.L.E.A.R. © with your communication

November 1, 2011

Here’s what being present looks and sounds like:

“I’m here fully with you, are you here?”

“I know that the judgments I have about you are really about me, so I’m putting them to one-side right now”

“As I listen to you I’m not concerned about what I’ll say next because I trust the right words or actions will follow”

“I’m aware of sights, sounds, and feelings around & inside me”

“I’m aware of what my needs are right now (rest, food, connection, information) and express them if they’re in the way of our interaction”

“Rather than assuming something about you, I’m going to ask”

Perfection & Being Present

Being present is about being perfect.Not big-P ‘must get everything absolutely right, stress myself out, tons of action steps, doing’ Perfection; but little-p ‘I’m here and nowhere else right now, trusting that I’ll respond just fine to whatever comes my way, being’ perfection.

When your focus is on the other person – or on the view – or in the project – VERSUS – fantasizing about the ideal relationship of the future or worst case scenario business deal result – or – reminiscing about yesterdays burned dinner; then you are in perfection. The perfection of trusting yourself to either respond well – or – that you can handle and will clean up whatever goes wrong.

Why does this matter in business?

1.  When you’re present, fully engaged in a task – that’s when we have the most fun and accomplish the most.

2.  When your agenda is in response to your client’s – versus more important than theirs – your client’s level of trust with you increases. More trust equals more business.

3.  We’ve all been with people who’s busy-ness feels more important than us – and that doesn’t build confidence.

4. When you are present, people sense that and are more likely to follow your leadership, embrace your suggestions, and share you with their business connections.

Find Ways to Bring Yourself Back to the Moment

Being present is a practice. Be in the practice, and know that it’s life-long. You don’t ever arrive, you just continue to hone your skill. Try it deliberately (what are 3 things that bring you into the moment?) for 30days and see what happens to your opinions, your world-view, your relationships and your stress levels!

Clara

Clara Chorley | CEO

Clarity Unlimited | Leadership Development | Speaking. Coaching. Consulting.

Get R.E.A.L. © for business growth

Get C.L.E.A.R. © with your communication

October 1, 2011

I posted this question on Facebook at the end of last month and here are some of the responses:

Courage. It’s the tipping point in the elevation of consciousness. You have to have the courage to dream, the courage to act and the courage to see it through. Without courage, you’re probably not growing. Peace.

Clear, authentic desire.

Giving back

Passion

Knowing you are worthy of it…

Diligence and ALWAYS giving 150% to each client

Changing the way you view ‘Success’

There are no secrets… Success is available to everyone… People just need to understand the difference between dreams and goals

I pulled it all together with this statement:

Being consistently courageous and in thoughtful, authentic action while serving a vision that’s bigger than yourself.

 Why does this matter?

Because we all want to be better – we all want to be our best; and more often than not it’s the voices in our heads, supported by non-questioning of others’ beliefs that get in the way. And what do those things get in the way of? They stand between you and a life lived without regret, shared with love, and departed from in peace.

What to do?

Firstly, write down what Success either looks like, or would look like in your life. Describe it in detail from how your business operates to the qualities and activities in your relationships. Then, once you’ve breathed that in – write down what you believe the biggest secret to creating this success is for you. Now ask yourself honestly if you’re applying that pearl of wisdom to your life.

Next steps after that? Well, if you’re not applying it so well – you could reach out to a coach (do you know a good one?!) for help getting back on track.

Don’t put this off. An unexamined life just isn’t as rich as it can be. It’s like eating eggs on toast for the hundredth time just because you’ve forgotten the jumbo shrimp and smoked salmon in the back of the fridge. It’s like comparing Snickers with Godiva; Mac with PC (ok, that one’s not fair). But, you get the point!

ClaraClara Chorley | CEO
Clarity Unlimited | Leadership Development | Speaking. Coaching. Consulting.

Get R.E.A.L. © for business growth
Get C.L.E.A.R. © with your communication

www.ClarityUnlimited.com | info@ClarityUnlimited.com
+ 1.415.592.0328 (International) + 1.888.614.5089 (USA & Canada)