Have you ever buried yourself in something and then ‘woken up’ a week or two later to discover that time passed and you hadn’t really noticed? Sometimes it’s when we’re focusing on something we love, like horse riding or reading a great book or painting or doing work we love; during those times the clock seems to stand still. Then there are other times when we’re so single focused that we also miss the time passing. The last 2 weeks have been that for me.
Last weekI attended a business bootcamp in San Diego. It was powerful. Any time I find myself as part of a team there’s always growth. I left with skills to use with clients, 3 new people who I know will be in my life long-term, plus access to an online community of other people, globally, who are on the same/similar journey. The journey being – growth, growth, growth, and expressing our gifts to the world.
Why am I sharing this?
I’m curious what your support system looks like. I have people to run ideas by, practice skills with, ask for help, celebrate and brainstorm with. Life is so much easier with these relationships in place. Spoken by someone who’s spent most of her life as a lone ranger most of my life.
Here’s a way for you to take a look at your support system.
An Exercise – Your People Circles
Draw 5 concentric circles (circles within circles)
- Label the center circle:: MasterMind (you’d do anything for them and them for you)
- Next circle out is: Peer Group (you share deeply, years could go by and it’s like yesterday, high trust, close friends max 5 people)
- Next circle out is: Friends (probably fit in some areas of your life, you can be a version of you with them – but maybe can’t have all the conversations you’d like)
- Last circle is: Acquaintances
Fill in the names of people who fall in each circle.
Then on a separate list write a list of MUST HAVEs & MUST NOT HAVEs qualities of those in each circle.
For example: MUST HAVE qualities for your MasterMind people might include: trust, weekly time together, honest feedback. MUST HAVE qualities for your Acquaintances circle might include: kindness/care for people, fun etc.
This is a powerful way to see the areas where you might want to focus on increasing your support.
NOTICE if you see someone in the Acquaintance circle who you’d like to move to friend circle (best to move people in to center, more intimate, groups slowly so you can build trust and intimacy; although you might move someone to a far outer circle quickly if there’s a significant break in trust) take steps to cultivate that relationship – start withe a regular lunch.
Make sure you create the support you need in your life. Once we’re out of school and all grown up we have to put time and energy into finding and building relationships. It’s much more fun to share this weird journey of life. We limit ourselves when we strive to do it all alone; plus it can be lonely…
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