“Should-ing”

I shoulda called my mother.
I shouldn’t’ve eaten that cake.
I shoulda made this change years ago.

And so it goes on…

An endless, exhaustive inner dialogue of every single thing we’re not doing:

“If I hadn’t eaten that cake, I’d be a good, worthwhile human being. But as I did – I’m not.”

It’s like living with a mean, judgmental roommate who tells us how we should be eating, working and generally living. And when we don’t measure up to their impossible standards – they berate us.

Exhausting.

I don’t know about you, but I get tired of feeling like I can’t measure up…  to myself.

Should You Follow Your Shoulds?

There’s a general rule about good decisions. The ones worth following are typically informed by 3 intelligence centers:

1) The Mind
2) The Heart
3) The Gut (intuition)

The “should-er” in you comes from the Mind.

It does lead to feelings. Often of guilt or shame. But the should-er is a thought.

So the next time you’re making a decision, run it by all 3 centers.

Decision: accept the job offer

Mind: take it, i’m sick of looking, this could be the only thing we get
Heart: all this rejection is painful, I want to leave – but I’m scared, too
Gut: say no, I have a bad feeling about your new boss, wait for something better

Whether it’s designing a new diet, deciding who to network with, or planning your day — check in with your 3 intelligence centers.

And if you find out your Mind was solely responsible for any decisions you didn’t follow through on… let yourself off the hook, and redesign.